So, it was just over three months ago that I made Dating Kinky live to the public. In that time, I’ve learned A LOT.
I mean, I had experience moderating and building dating sites before. I’ve worked with some big ones, even. I was pretty sure I had this.
I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve tripped on my own hubris more than once in the past 90 days.
Something I am proud of, though: I’ve been learning.
You see, I did a lot of research before starting Dating Kinky. I took months finding just the right code base to start with, and then another two months to customize before I let anyone in. We tested with a few hundred people for a month before we opened up to the world, and still, I had more plans.
But things started going wrong.
This code base—this award-winning code we bought and customized—well, who knew it was never meant to really manage successful dating sites? By that, I mean sites who actually make it to more than 2,000 people.
And who knew that the overall structure was at least 7 years out of date, and all those awards were from people who didn’t know that, couldn’t know that?
I sure as hell didn’t.
But I was proud of Dating Kinky. And I still am. Because we offer things other kinky dating sites don’t, like 8 genders, poly matching, references, relationship stauses and more.
But we’ve already outgrown it. We’re splitting the seams, and I still have a dozen more functions I want to add and changes I want to make to the existing functions.
So, what now?
Well, I’m digging in, and building the site from scratch. I and my development team are writing thousands (probably millions) of lines of code to make Dating Kinky what it should be, and to make room for all the amazing people that keep signing up (Thank you!).
What does this mean to you?
Well, a few things:
1. I want your ideas and suggestions.
Everything you can throw at us, no matter how off-the wall. NOW is the time. I’ve got some amazing functionality planned, but YOU are the reason for all of it. Tell me about what your IDEAL dating site would have.
2. I’ll be looking for testers for the new site.
DO you like to find bugs and errors and see things before they are available to the general public? Great! Reach out. I want you in on this.
3. Things might seem a bit quiet, development-wise on Dating Kinky over the next two months.
Because we’re improving, but where it’s not really visible. Then, all of a sudden, we’ll be unveiling things. I’ll do updates and so on, but you’ll be hearing about a lot of cool features that don’t exist yet.
4. New Apps.
Yeah. They suck, too. They were (again) customized versions of apps that connected with the package I bought (and cost an additional amount). They suck. The company gave them to me with errors, some I’ve managed to fix, but they won’t fix many of them, and the code is so terrible (and out of date), my team is tossing it out and starting from scratch. They are useful as basic messengers, but… well… not much else. I’m working on that, promise. I’ll keep you up-to-date, there, too.
And it’s not all bad. In fact, to be honest, it’s not very bad at all. By starting where we did, I discovered many things I would not have thought of in creating a dating site (because they weren’t part of the sites I’d worked on/in/built before), and I’m thankful for that, even though we’ll leave it behind.
We’ve also added 5,000 users in the past month, and we’re going to keep growing.
As one of the early adopters of FetLife, I know that there are going to be many roadbumps ahead (remember when FetLife went up and down more often than a kangaroo in mating season?), and I’m up to the challenge.
Thank you to all of you who have joined, and are making my vision of a kinky dating site with AMAZING members a reality.
I’m working hard for you to live up to your trust.
I just wanted to tell ya’ll this.